Welcome to Emma Clarke’s global soapbox – the antidote to modern living, encapsulated in a series of freewheeling rants.

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“Can you sound like a mad clown in a cowshed?”

The phone rang. It was a regular customer. “Can you sound like a mad clown in a cowshed?” “Do bears...
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Blink-and-you’ll-miss-me just after midnight

No, it’s not the title of a little-known Abba song. Tonight, just after the stroke of midnight, London will celebrate...
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What happens when you stare at a lake for waaaay too long

This is a poem I wrote years ago while sitting mesmerised by Lake Windermere. (Look, I’d had a hard night)....
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In which a freelancer politely asks for payment on very old invoices and is blacklisted for doing so

I’ve recorded this blog post. Have a listen if you don’t have time to read it. It’s great being freelance....
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Character voices

“Dear Emma Clarke, do you do men?”

Reader, it’s a question I’m sometimes asked. In this case, the follow-up question was “Specifically, do you do Yorkshire men?...
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Double headed stuff

This is the most extraordinary Santa voice you’ll ever hear.

When international voice sensation and long-time studio pal Rich Sweetman was asked to do a Santa impression, nobody guessed what...
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Double headed stuff

Me and funnyman colleague Rich Sweetman have gone Christmas crackers!

Look, I realise it’s October and I’ve just invoked the ‘C’ word but for us poor souls toiling in voiceoverland,...
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“Is this the life we really want?”

  It’s a damn fine question. And I’m delighted to tell you that I’ve been working with Roger Waters on...
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Some of Emma’s clients

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“The perfect delivery. Every single time. Guaranteed. And always up for a brew and some cake.”
Chris Stevens, director, Devaweb
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“Emma is the best. I have no hesitation in recommending her for any voice over – she can handle anything.”
Mike Wyer, BBC