I am the Chlamydia voice of choice

It’s official.  I am ‘the Chlamydia voice of choice.’

Today one of my clients sent me ANOTHER ad about sexually transmitted diseases.  I’m beginning to see a pattern.  The client sent me an email:  “I saw this script and thought of you,“ he wrote.

I’ll level with you, Reader: I’m not sure this is a compliment.

I challenged him.

“Why?” I asked.  “Why did you think of me when you saw a Chlamydia ad?”

“It had you written all over it,“ he said.  “Young, saucy, been about a bit…“

“What do you mean?” I demanded.  “Been about a bit?”

“Well, let’s not beat about the bush,“ he said, “you’re a woman of the world.”

“I am so not!” I said, rather defensively.  “I go to garden centres at weekends!  I’m a member of The National Trust!  I’m a fan ofTime Team.  I do not go clubbing, have one night stands, or getsexually transmitted diseases.”

“That might be the case,“ he said.  “But you can sound as if you do.”

Here, I could see his point.  When pressed, I can sound like a right smacked up slag.

“Could I do one about herpes?” I begged. “Just for a bit of variety?”

“No,“ he said.  “You’re the Chlamydia girl.  *Name of other female voiceover* is herpes.  If you’re lucky we might have a domestic violence awareness ad later this week.  You can do that.  Keep your fingers crossed.”