Other people’s conversations

I’ll admit it, I’m nosey.  As a child, my mother was always telling me not to stare at strangers.  Now I’m all grown up, the staring has graduated into ‘people watching’ and I’ve perfected my technique to such a degree that I’ve only been threatened twice in the past year.

I love eavesdropping too.  I was in a National Trust tea room on Saturday and heard the following, spoken by a well-dressed middle-aged lady with bifocals and a perm.  She was chatting to a friend over a pot of tea and a flapjack.

“He was my decorator.  I’d had HRT.  Nature took its course,” she said.  And in three simple phrases she’d given me characters, plot, subtext and a wonderful euphemism for a paste-splattered collision.

I could picture the decorator, all dungareed and paint-smudged descending his ladder with a brush in his pocket.  And the woman, released from the tyranny of hot-flushes and arid genitals suddenly grasping undercoat in a whole new way.

It wasn’t quite in the same league as Hemingway’s brilliant ‘flash fiction’ six word short story (“For sale.  Baby shoes.  Never worn.”) but it comes close.

Reader, I nearly laughed out loud.

Which reminds me, I had a conversation with a woman a couple of weeks ago who used LOL as as actual word.

“Oh, that’s funny,“ she trilled.  “LOL!!”

“I’m sorry?” I said.

“LOL,“ she said.  “I’m indicating that I’m laughing out loud.”

“Oh,“ I said.  “But I’m standing right in front of you.  I can see you’re laughing and, Lord help us, everyone within half a mile knows you’re doing it loudly.”

I waited for her to introduce LMFAO or RAFL into the conversation but sadly, I was left wanting…

“when it comes to…”

Why you should hire a professional voiceover

Getting Right With Tao

Previous Blog Next Blog
Avatar image

Emma Clarke

Emma is an award-winning voiceover, broadcaster and writer. Want to find out more about Emma?
Read more about Emma
Read some TestimonialsGo back to Home

Some of Emma’s clients

Testimonial image
“The perfect delivery. Every single time. Guaranteed. And always up for a brew and some cake.”
Chris Stevens, director, Devaweb
Testimonial image
“Emma is the best. I have no hesitation in recommending her for any voice over – she can handle anything.”
Mike Wyer, BBC